Nativity plays are a traditional part of the Christmas season in many schools. But should parents allow children from non-Christian backgrounds to opt-out? Or is joining in the most important thing? Education expert, Elizabeth Cook, advises.

Raisingkids member's problem
My son's reception class are organising a nativity play. I'm not religious - none of my family are - and I'm not really keen on him taking part. His school has non-denominational assemblies, which I have no problem with, but I would rather my son was left to make his own mind up about religion when he is old enough to decide. At the same time, I don't want to spoil his fun and make him feel left out. What should I do? Should I talk to his Head of Year?

Elizabeth's advice
I think that you should stop worrying - the nativity play is just a reminder to children that Christmas is not just about receiving presents. I don't think that one nativity play will make any difference to his religious beliefs or lack of them. For most children, it's just an opportunity to perform for their mums and dads and it's forgotten a few weeks later.

However, it is something that the majority of his class will be involved in and by excluding him you could make him very unhappy and also draw more attention to the religious event than being in the nativity play would. I would advise you to do nothing.

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• Back to the Christmas section