The Expectant Blogger
Week 16: 'I've got so many questions...!'

Our blooming blogger talks us through the weekly ups and downs of a first-time pregnancy.

This week my very good friends brought a baby boy into the world. It's such exciting news when your closest friends are involved. On seeing the pictures of the little boy, it brought tears to my eyes because he is so gorgeous and because I have seen him grow in his mother's tummy. I can't wait to see them all settled.

It's also nice because when my time comes to deliver she'll be able to tell me everything (although she has already told me about labour and giving birth). Some people say it is good to get advice from new mothers as it's all fresh in the mind. Too fresh?!

Antenatal appt
This week I have been for my blood/urine tests and although I didn't have a scan, I did hear the heartbeat. It took a while to find it, and I did keep calm but after about 30 seconds, the midwife informed me that the baby was sitting at the bottom near my back. On hearing the heartbeat, it was nice and reassuring – in my mind, I was saying ‘Hello Bean, I can hear you, mummy loves you sweetie’.

On this appointment, I felt like I had so many questions to ask, as I have been feeling somewhat in the dark about loads of things. One of my questions was 'Do I get to look around hospitals to decide where we are having it?'. The response was strange and a tiny bit abrupt. ‘Well by coming to this clinic you're going to be going to our recommended hospital. Why would you want to go anywhere else? And if you don’t want to go there then you need to have these appointments somewhere else.’

I was kind of confused by this as my doctor had just immediately referred me to this clinic and told me we didn’t need to make the decision yet! I then explained that I had not been told anything about this, and that no one informed me about this decision. I did tell her my concerns about after-care and cleanliness. I haven't been to a hospital in about a million years, so I might want to look at a few to see which one I like.

We finally got around to talking about a new Birthing Centre, which is opening in my area in May and is part of this hospital. It sounds like something I would want to do. Run by midwives they have more of a homey feel about it. They have decided to set this up like a home birth, they have comfortable rooms so your partner can stay with you throughout, and they encourage a natural birth.

Now I am no Earth mother so to speak, but (and this is from the girl who faints when she has injections or cuts her finger) a water birth feels like something I want to do, I feel drawn to the idea of being submerged in water. Should the pregnancy have any complications I can move to the normal labour ward, which is one floor away in the same building.

Notes what notes?
It was good to get my notes this week. I saw a friend a couple of weeks ago who made me worry when she said, ‘Where are your notes?’ ‘Notes? What notes?' was my response and it made me feel like I really didn't know what was going on at all. She had got them on her 12 week scan, but I hadn't been told about them. I have them now and they are interesting as you can see all of your test results and more.

There's really no need to panic if you don't get them early on. However, if you don’t have them by 20 weeks, call and ask for them because if you're planning a holiday or you need to go to hospital on an emergency it's good for you to take them with you.

Bookworm
I'm currently reading a good book - ‘A Perfect Start’ by Christine and Peter Hill - and it's reassuring me. It simply says that no birth is perfect, and we as mothers shouldn't put such pressure on ourselves. It's all to do with the baby’s position and the shape of your pelvis. Labour isn't something which will affect your baby’s life i.e. if it is a trauma birth or C- section/Epidural. Your baby has been developing for months and this is only one milestone for its next stage of life.

The book also says you shouldn't feel down if it's not all going according to plan. You need to enjoy time with the newest member of your family. This makes sense and I want to avoid stressing myself as much as possible.

Bring on my holiday
My holiday is less than two weeks away and I really can't wait to go for the sun and see - but sadly no cocktails for me this time. The midwife gave me some advice about travelling. As my flight is about eight hours long she told me to 'sit in an aisle seat, if you can afford it upgrade yourself for comfort, get up and walk around as much as you can, keep hydrated, take bottled water with you on the plane and some fruit to nibble on. Take your notes on holiday. Tell your insurance people for medical insurance but at this stage you do not need to inform the airline.'

She also said as pregnant women are more at risk of getting DVT that I should wear those support socks. These are about £14 in Boots but if you go to your doctor you can get them on prescription and they will only cost you £6.

I also consulted my local chemist on matters of insect repellent. They told me that I really need to consult my doctor but that they would advise against using it. My tip for this is if you like marmite, eat some of this as apparently it repels the mosquitos. Another one is soda water - although I've never tried this, people swear by it.

Other news
This week my pregnant pal (in the office) and I have discussed:
Her nosebleeds - she has never had them before and now she has had about six, and of course, this is due to the many zillions, more pints of blood you have in your body. For me I have a little pain in my coccyx (the tail end of my spine). To help solve this I've bought a new pillow and this seems to be solving the ache. The pair of us have also been having the odd treat - this week it was a nice slice of cake.

My moods are improving slowly, and I'm being very nice to my husband...most of the time. I have been a bit short with some people in situations where I would normally hold my tongue. This week my claws occasionally came out.

My husband is being great as usual, and this week he told his boss about Bean who was very pleased for us and gave some good advice as he has a toddler at home.

• Read more from our Expectant Blogger here
  
• Travelling while pregnant
  
  
• Pregnancy timeline - week 16
  
  
• Urine tests during pregnancy