How can you brush a toddler's teeth when he won't open his mouth? Dental hygienist Gerald Wennerstrom has a few helpful suggestions.

Raisingkids member's problem
Can anyone help me? I'm looking for tips on cleaning my son's teeth. He's 20 months old and will not open his mouth - he just screams and cries. I've tried letting him hold the brush first but this doesn't help. I also cleaned my teeth the same time and I've tried singing 'This is the way we brush our teeth...' but still nothing. Any ideas?

Gerald Wennerstrom's reply
My 19 months old son is just now settling into having his teeth brushed and flossed without the drama/trauma (it was the same with my other children). I tried letting him watch me brush and floss, and watch his older sister having her teeth brushed - nothing worked. And now he tells us when he needs his teeth brushed!

One theory for the struggle is that the mouth is the only source of nourishment for the child and any messing around with it sets off an alarm in their heads to protect it. Other reasons could be:

• toothbrush too stiff
• wrong technique
• parent afraid of hurting the child (transferring fear to the child)
• being in a hurry
• sores in the mouth
• older siblings suggesting something bad will happen.

So what can you do? Try an electric toothbrush. With an electric toothbrush you can do a more thorough job quicker. There's no real need for toothpaste at this stage - it's too messy (wait until they're 2-3 yrs-old).

If the problem happens in a certain room move to another, change who brushes the teeth, make it fun not a chore, keep it quick, be low key, make it their special time - and follow with a story or cuddles. But do set a routine it makes them feel secure.

Always keep your cool and praise them when they do let you. Start with baby steps and work up. One night brush just the front teeth; praise them for letting you do so. Then the next night add another side, and so on until you have their complete cooperation. The key is to set a routine, praise and reward when they cooperate and preserve.

It can be a struggle, but it's well worth it when they smile and their teeth are cavity free!