What do you do when you find out that not only has your child lied to you, but that they've gone to some lengths to deceive you? Our teenager expert has an unusually keen understanding of this particular issue.

Raisingkids member's problem
I have a dilemma on my hands. My son forged his school report to give himself better grades. I found his original report hidden and asked him why changed it and he did not give me a reason. He gave himself better grades than the ones he had although his original report was a improvement from his last report. I have not discussed this with him yet and I have not confronted or punished him. What do I do?

Expert Chris Turner's Advice
Sorry, but this raised so many memories for me, as it was something I did and got caught doing - mainly because I am dyslexic and I had added comments complete with spelling mistakes!

Personally I wouldn't punish him, but would talk to him. Tell him that you are pleased that his grades are better than his last report, without him changing them, and explain that it's all you ask of him. Tell him how you feel, that you are happy there is some improvement and that you are proud that he has improved.

But also explain that by changing the grades it is a form of lying, not only to you but also to himself. You may never get a reason out of him as to why he did it, but just talk to him and try and explain that he didn't need to do it.

Be firm, but don't shout. Ask for reassurance that he won't do it again and double-check that everything is OK at school.