At the end of a long, difficult day at work, which prospect is most appealing - a stiff drink, a relaxing soak in the bath, or going to that management seminar your boss recommended?

Keep your own answer in mind when planning after-school activities for your child.

Too much, too young?
A 6-and-a-half-hour day may not seem long to an adult but at 12 it can feel arduous and at 8, endless.

Most children also have homework. Children and teenagers - just like adults - need time to chill out. How would you feel if every minute of your spare time was planned for you by someone else? Nor is a little boredom anything to be afraid of - it can be a great spur to creative thinking.

All work and no play
On the other hand, sports and the arts tend to be squeezed under the pressure of national curriculum, so after-school clubs can help fill those gaps. Most secondary schools offer a range of extras but primaries are more variable.

What, when and why?
Base decisions about which activities to take up - and how many - on your child's interests and talents. Pressuring an indifferent child to learn the violin because her elder sister loved it isn't advisable.

However, if your child develops an obsession with ballet, it would be sad not to encourage it, if the family can afford it. The obsession may not last, but your child is sure to gain something from the experience. Many arts subjects complement academic subjects. Drama, for example, adds a vital dimension to English Literature, while music is thought to have strong links with mathematics.

A sporting chance
Encouraging your child to persevere with sports is more important than in the past. Research shows that children are less physically active than ever before and childhood obesity is climbing toward US levels. 'Sport' need not mean team games; swimming, cycling, skating, gymnastics and dance are excellent, enjoyable exercise.

What's the cost?
Be realistic - will your child have time for football, tennis, swimming, drama and homework? And consider how much private tuition are you prepared to pay for, bearing in mind the costs of sports equipment, dance gear, musical instruments etc. Are you happy to act as a free children's taxi service in the evenings? It's easy to be pressured into feeling that your child ought to be doing extras, especially when your friend's daughter is learning 2 languages plus ballet, and she's only 6!

Different children, different needs
Apart from having different talents, children also have different requirements for stimulation. If a child is physically active and energetic, after-school activities are a must after a day of sitting at school. But if your child escapes into books or computers, or is simply happier alone, respect the need for personal space.

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