Is it normal for a toddler to live in the Land of Make-Believe? Dr. Pat Spungin, raisingkids.co.uk's parenting expert, advises on what constitutes a healthy imagination - and what doesn't.

Raisingkids member's problem
My 3 yr-old has imaginary friends. She talks to, and bosses around, one in particular who gets the blame when something goes wrong. My daughter also speaks in an imaginary language on occasions. Is this normal for a 3 yr-old? Or is her active imagination a symptom of loneliness, perhaps due to the fact that she is an only child in a single parent family?

Dr Spungin's advice
Your daughter is developing a rich, imaginative, inner world and this will stay with her throughout her life. As long as she's sociable and outgoing with other children when they are around, I wouldn't worry. In fact, many psychologists worry that today's children have too many toys that don't stimulate their imagination. Recent research has indicated that toys and games could even be stunting their early development.

Parents who can afford to buy their children lots of toys are often unaware that they may be doing their kids a diservice. Many toys force children to conform to gender roles and aren't easily adapted to different playing scenarios. For example, it's often the case that parents succumb to media pressure and buy that expensive toy they've seen advertised on the TV, only to find their little girl prefers to play with an old car or construct things with Lego. Under 5s in particular need to play with toys that allow them to take control, that are flexible and do more than one thing! Reading, singing and role-play are great ways to put the toys aside and use your imagination for entertainment and learning.

It sounds to me that your daughter is, in fact, very capable of finding stimulation in the world around her - a result of having her imagination stimulated from a young age. Creative play, such talking to imaginary friends, is an indication that she has learnt to focus and concentrate on one activity, develop her own ideas and not be over-reliant on outside stimulus. Children who are inundated with toys are often easily distracted, and have a short concentration span.

If you worry that your child is lonely, be reassured by research which shows a healthy imagination is a result of the parent engaging in play with their child, rather than leaving them with a pile of toys. The fact that your daughter has formed a 'relationship' with her imaginary friend shows she's practicing the social skills that you have taught her and this is also very positive.

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