Is it normal for a 10 yr-old to get so homesick that it brings on physical symptoms? Raisingkids.co.uk's child psychologist Dr Pat Spungin suggests ways of dealing with, and preparing for homesickness on school trips.

Raisingkids member's problem
Many of 10 yr-old's friends and most others her age look forward to sleep-overs and Girl Guide camps, but it fills my daughter with dread. She can't even bear to sleep at her grandmother's house. If she is made to sleep out she is permanently on the toilet and is physically sick on her way to her destination. The whole of the year is due to go on a school trip for 2 nights away and I don't want her to miss out. What can I do to encourage her to be like all her other friends and are there any help groups dealing with this problem?

Dr Spungin's advice
I can sympathise - I also knew a child who got homesick and often had to be picked up from a friend's house in the middle of the night. The odd thing was that she was the most sociable child in the family but hated staying away from home.

On school trips there are always one or two children who get desperately homesick. They do grow out of it but that doesn't help in the short term. I wouldn't make her go on the trip. If she gets physically sick even with her grandmother, I don't think there is any solution in the short term that will get her on a school trip. Some thoughts - talk to her and take a lead from what she says. Is she keen to go? Does she feel she will miss out? If she doesn't want to go, then I would leave it.

If she would like to go, try to see if there are things that can be done to make it easier for her. First talk to her teacher, who will probably have seen it before and have some suggestions. The teacher also needs to be alerted to the fact that your daughter does get homesick. Prepare your daughter as much as possible - who will she share a room with, what should she do if she gets homesick, who should she talk to? Let her take something that reminds her of home - photos, toys, a blanket...

Make sure that if she's homesick that she is able to phone home. (Sometimes pupils on school trips are not allowed to call home.) Finally, although she will benefit from the trip now, don't force the issue if it will be traumatic. Remember there will be lots of school trips in the future that she can go on, and enjoy.

• More Answers From Dr Spungin
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• Parenting Pre-Teens: Scared To Let Go?