Parenting Pre-Teens: Setting Priorities
As your child moves towards adolescence, decide what's important to
you and be flexible on lesser things. Hold firm on important matters.
Show
yourself prepared to understand your child's viewpoint and she will be
more likely to understand yours.
Just
say 'no'? Not always
If you say 'no' to everything, you will only increase your pre-teen's
rebelliousness. Listen, discuss and give a little and you will get credit
for being flexible. Does it really matter if your son listens to gangsta
rap music, if he works hard at school? If your daughter has wants to wear
lipgloss at the weekend, but is obliging and respectful to you, give her
some credit.
Show
respect
Accept your children for what they are. Don't comment negatively on their
clothes, music or taste in television. Show respect for their opinions
even if you disagree. Don't try to change them into something you want
them to be. A useful trick is to imagine they are someone else's teenager
and ask yourself, 'Would I say that if it wasn't my son or daughter?'
If the answer is 'No', then don't say it.
Avoid being fired as a parent
Most pre-teens want to stay friends with
their parents and value their guidance. At the same time, they want recognition
that they aren't 'babies' any more and ask to be treated as such.
|
