Your Pre-teen And Smoking
If you've found cigarettes in your pre-teen's schoolbag, it doesn't
automatically mean a habit. But why would an under-13 want to take up
the weed in the first place?
This
is one of the most difficult problems for parents. Children know the risks
but still they do it. It's the peer group, stupid!
Heard
it all before
Your child knows the risks to her health, she knows it's a filthy habit,
she knows it stains her teeth and the rest, but none of it seems to have
any effect. Who smokes - and why they do - is a mystery. The children
of non-smokers smoke, the children of heavy smokers don't. The influence
of friends appears to be more important than family.
Talk
to her
Don't remind her that terrible things will happen
to her when she is 50. 30 looks old to her and 50-plus is really out of
the frame. Don't lecture or nag, however strongly you feel. Try to talk
to her calmly and use arguments that she might respond to.
Concentrate on the immediate rewards: money saved for other nicer treats,
clean teeth, clean smelling clothes. Remind her of that... and she'll
recognise the truth of this: if she gets hooked, she'll want to give up
in 5 years time. The longer she smokes the more difficult it will be.
Some politically conscious teens are susceptible to arguments about the
profits that big business reaps from weak-willed teenagers.
Try bribery
Some parents find bribery works. A friend promised her son a large sum of money on his 18th birthday on the assumption that if he could last until then, he was unlikely to start later. Not a cast-iron guarantee since many students start to smoke at university, but generally, the later they start the less likely they are to continue.
It pays not to smoke
Work out what it costs her to smoke every week and do a deal with her that she will break the habit in a month. For the first week, each day she puts the money she saves into a pot and you match the amount. In the second week, you give double the amount she saves. In week three, three times and in week four, four times the amount saved. At the end of four weeks she will have amassed a tidy sum and broken the smoking habit.
If she smokes within the four weeks, she forfeits the lot and you pocket it! This approach only works if she has a commitment to give up and saving money is the right incentive for her.
Setting a good example
Above all, if you smoke, don't leave your cigarettes lying around. Don't allow her to smoke in the house.
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