Is your pre-teen a faddy eater? Picky eating can drive you mad but it's not necessarily harmful.

Does your child look well? Is she energetic and healthy? If so, she may just have a naturally small appetite.

Mellow out
Faddy eating habits don't automatically mean something's wrong. It's important to make meals enjoyable experiences. If she comes to the table braced for an ordeal, she's unlikely to eat more and try new things.

If you expect her to be 'the faddy eater' she'll probably play up to the label. Don't nag her. Serve her what she wants, when she has finished ask if she wants more, if she says no accept it. Remember that more people suffer from problems as a result of over-eating than under-eating.

One man's meat...
What foods does she like? Build a balanced diet for everyone, incorporating her favourite things. Don't make an individual meal especially for her.

Look at what she eats - is it really so bad? Don't be too strict about 'junk' food - cheeseburgers and pizza are unconventional sources of calcium. Calcium is particularly important at this age so if she doesn't like milk, offer alternatives like tofu, sardines on toast or almonds.

Hands-on experience
Take her shopping with you and let her get involved in choosing the week's menu. Encourage her to develop an interest in cooking. If she understands the effort that goes into preparing a meal, she might start appreciating it more.

What about her friends?
Maybe she's just not hungry. Does she eat a lot of crisps and sweets at school? Is the local burger bar the social centre? If you still feel concerned, ask friends' parents about her eating habits at their houses. You might be surprised at how little fuss she makes away from home.

Keep an eye out for a developing 'diet culture' amongst her peers. If she's coming under pressure at school to be thin, counter it by boosting her confidence and discussing image and weight issues with her.

When to worry
Picky eating doesn't equal an eating disorder BUT trust your instincts and watch out for warning signs. If she loses weight, you suspect forced vomiting or know that she is deliberately going without food, seek immediate medical advice.

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