Raisingkids.co.uk's parenting expert and child psychologist, Dr Pat Spungin, tackles the problem of a sensitive child faced with frightening footage of the war in Iraq.

Raisingkids member's problem
My 7 yr-old is a very sensitive child and just recently he's started coming into our bed at night saying he's scared. Is it possible that he is frightened by the wall-to-wall coverage of the war in Iraq?

Dr Spungin's advice
Yes, it is possible that he's picked up some of the anxieties of the adults around him about the war, but it is equally likely that something unconnected has also upset him. Many children, especially sensitive ones, develop fears which are very real. Alone in their bed at night, these fears can become very worrying and naturally your child seeks comfort with you.

Ask him what he is scared of but don't have a long discussion about it. I suggest you ask him at the time, because you can reassure him there and then, and because it's quite possible that he'll have forgotten about it in the morning.

Next day, find a nice quiet time and see if you can get to the bottom of any fears that he may have. You ask if it's connected with the war - although there is extensive coverage, the majority of what we see on our TV screens is not frightening in itself. Adults find it scary, because we know it's real. I don't think that many children of your son's age appreciate this.

The question is not about images but about other things he may believe. He may think that the war is very close and therefore may involve him and his family. He may have heard about poison on public transport and may imagine that the buses and trains he uses may be affected. If he has heard about planes being shot down he may be afraid if anyone he knows is flying, or he may imagine that if Iraq wins that Saddam Hussein will then rule our country.

These fears are very unrealistic to an adult but very real to a child. So, don't be too quick to reassure that everything is alright, as he may feel that you don't take these worries seriously. Encourage your son to express his fears and then you can help him deal with them realistically.

• More Answers From Dr Spungin
• Tips On Talking It Through In Our Parenting Skills Section