The results are out, but for many parents it's a time of disappointment rather than joy. Dr Pat Spungin offers emotional and practical advice on how to help your child deal with poor results.

Is it a lost cause?
The very first question any parent or child should ask themselves is 'Is this a lost cause?' If your child has missed out on the university and course of their choice by only a small margin, it's certainly worth trying to persuade the admissions tutor that they're still worth a place.

Of course, your child won't be the only person thinking of this – make sure they sit down and prepare a case before calling the college. Have them ask themselves why, if they were in the tutor's shoes, they would offer them a place. Come up with a statement that explains why they were particularly interested in the course in the first place. Perhaps they've written an essay of particular relevance, or done some interesting work experience. Waste no time and do this as quickly as possible!

'I told you so!'
If your child had poor results as a result of not putting the work in, although there's a great temptation, now isn't the time to say: 'I told you so'. If your son or daughter didn't put the hours in, they're under no illusion now as to the end results of their behaviour. This is a time to offer emotional support. It's also the time to encourage your child to act for themselves. Being pro-active in finding a solution to this problem will make them feel better. You can't do this for them. Until now you may have been holding their hand, but they have to take responsibility for themselves. Remember – if they have to have a gap year out and have to earn their own money it could end up being the making of them.

Clearing up
If re-sits aren't an option, is there another course or college where your child would want to go? If they haven't had an offer of a place, they'll receive their clearing passport. Ask them to remember the things they considered when they were first applying. They shouldn't take a course that isn't what they want just because they want to go to college. It's important to make sure they're on the right course for them – it's certainly preferable to dropping out later on. Two words of advice are critical here: Don't panic!

Useful Links

UCAS clearing

Radio One – What to do about poor results