If you ever feel you words float straight through your teenager's head, find out how to talk so your teenager will listen.

Frustrated because your teenager doesn't take any notice of what you say? Is it like talking to a brick wall? Are these scenarios familiar?

I keep telling her...
'I don't know what to do about my daughter. I keep telling her that if she keeps coming home late, she's grounded.'

'Telling her' isn't working. Your message isn't getting through. Stop focusing on her behaviour. Consider your own. Rather than 'telling' - try to do more listening. Try to understand why she behaves as she does. There may be a perfectly good reason and a sympathetic ear is all that is needed. If you listen to her, perhaps she will listen to you. Then you may be able to find a solution you can both accept.

I can't get him to see...
'My son is so worried about school. There is nothing to be concerned about but I can't get him to see that.'

A psychologist would say that if your reassurances do not reassure, then perhaps there is something else underlying the anxiety. Stop soothing. Try to listen and understand what his underlying concerns are.

• Parenting Teens: Where You Both Stand
• Parenting Teens: Are You Scared To Let Go?
• Parenting Teens: Setting Priorities
• What Teens Want: Love & Support