Parenting
Teens: Starting From Scratch
As your child grows up, your relationship changes. With a teenager
on your hands, what can you expect to see?
How it used to be
As
a parent, you used to be a very powerful figure. You knew everything about
your child's life; he listened wide-eyed to what you said and believed
it all.
You made the decisions about his life; if you insisted that something
be done, it got done. You knew what was best for your child and he accepted
it.
How
it is now
With a teenager, things are totally different. Once he turned to you for
help and advice, now it's the opinion of friends that matters. Once you
knew everything, now you know nothing about anything important, like music,
friends, relationships and fashion. In working out what he believes in,
your teenager's first step may be rejection of your values. Sceptical
and challenging of your authority, your teenager will resist your attempts
to control him.
Where it's going
Good parents work themselves out of a
job. They take a baby who is totally dependent and turn him into a competent
adult who can manage his own life. This process involves stepping back
as the growing child takes on more and more control of his own life.
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