It's understandable that your teenager is unhappy about a new man coming into the house. How can you avoid the worst of the rows?

It's unlikely to be plain sailng all the way but by listening to your teen and limiting their behavior, the atmosphere should improve. A few simple steps will help the process but you need to show self-control and take the lead. After all, you 're the adult in this situation, no matter how 'grown-up' your teenager thinks he is.

Listen even if you don't like it
If there are specific things that bother your teenager, hear him out and see if together you can work out a solution. Just being listened to may make him feel better, especially if he has never been able to express his anger and grief at the loss of his father. Perhaps he resents your partner's attempts to take on the role of father to himself or his brothers and sisters.

If your son criticises your partner, don't react angrily. That will only make him feel you are taking your partner's side and increase the sense of competition. When you have heard him out, talk to your husband about it.

Set limits on the expression of feeling
Your son will have to work through his feelings about your partner over time. His behaviour is something else. Make it clear that living together is something that everyone has to work at and that certain kinds of behaviour are not allowed - for example, rudeness to your partner.

Although it's very unlikely, there is always a possibility that there may be something serious behind your son's dislike of your husband. It may be difficult to accept accusations about the man you love, but your first responsibility is your son's well being.